Monday, May 23, 2011

Multiple Things

So, I will just make this blog entry a list.

1. Never sleep in your contacts, my eye is burning severely from being scratched and I have to wait until tomorrow to see a doctor. Hopefully there will be no eye infections.

2. The tornadoes worry me. My church is collecting clothing and things for victims of the tornado, and here's hoping that (since we are in the red zone) that we do not have on here tonight.

3. I am about to probably order two pairs of bloomers, just have to defeat this feeling of guilt over spending money on them. I'm going to try to donate worth far more than I spend to try to make it more fair.

4. I am getting my wisdom teeth removed in two days. Can anyone say "Green Tea Icecream"? :3  <3

5. I should only deep condition my hair each time after I wash it, it's already splitting again...

6. I want to start a Beauty blog and perhaps a random song, music video, and picture blog.

7. I am once again going to push the limits of human capacity by lacking greatly in sleep. 

Good night everyone! ~<3

Sleep is for the weak.


Sunday, May 22, 2011

Happy International Goth Day! And How Lolita relates to Religion.

     May 22nd is World Goth Day!

     I can't believe I almost forgot. -deep sigh- Alas, now it is absolutely necessary that I attempt to organize something with my friends. On the bright side, I did dig through my old gosu-rori clothes today to get ready for church. Platform shoes, knee-high socks, a petticoat with a knee-length flowing black shirt, and a black almost Moi Meme Moitie styled sheer long-sleeve romantic blouse. Due to my lacking of a headdress which looks right with my current hair length (pics shall be included), I settled on a simple black rose in my hair. I do own two mini top hats and a Victorian hand-made headdress which rests on the side of the head... but as I mentioned, none of them look quite right with my hair. And although most all lolitas cut their bangs straight across, I had bangs like that from the time I was a very very little girl until my freshman year in highschool- NEVER.AGAIN. Any of you who have bleached-out Slavic dark, unmanaged curly hair will fully understand my pain.

     So, yesterday I came across some interesting online conversations about religion (specifically Christianity) and Lolita. Now, I have always come across many a websites concerning Goth and Christianity, but not Lolita. Also, there was the deal with some Christians who thought the Rapture was suppose to take place yesterday... All three of these subjects I would like to discuss with you.

     First, is the idea of religion and any set style, not just Lolita. Unless it is provocative or you are wearing symbols which stand against what you believe, I don't understand how how a person chooses to adorn their bodies has anything to do with matters of the Spirit.

"People judge by outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart." ~ 1 Samuel 16:7

     Much of Lolita fashion comes from eras in Europe where a faith in God was the most important part of people's everyday lives. The Cathedrals, the art, the music, and the progression of the arts are all perfect examples of this. It is said in the Bible that if we have any talents, we should use them to glorify God who gave us these talents, and if not, then He who gave us the bodies and the minds to expand our talents. People poured their heart into their works because of this, and they prospered and improved, and their work stands today. 

As Lolitas, many of us embody their work today.

     Many Lolitas are not Christian, just as many Christians (obviously) are not Lolitas, and just as many Goths are not Lolitas, and just as many Lolitas are not Goths, and just as many Goths are not Christians. But there are those of us who are all or none of these things, I am one of those people who embodies all of these things. Not only that, I find that they complement each other quite well. 

     For the relation between Goth and Christianity, or Goth and Religion, I have heard many goths and many Christians think that the two were not compatible with each other: I beg to differ. 
First, I suggest to anyone who is curious about this to check out this website and to read this book:
And to read the book God Loves the Freaks by Stephen Weese. 

When you be a Goth, a Punk, a Lolita, or anything else, you are choosing and accepting a different culture from the mainstream. Many people view us as freaks, or as lesser persons for having different tastes than the majority of the population. Maybe from this point, some of us revel and worship individuality to the point we are not willing to give certain religions, political views, or media a try simply because they are too "mainstream". Regardless, we are people too. We have lives, hobbies, favorite foods, things that make us laugh and thinks that make us pissy. Maybe they are different things than they are for most people, but that doesn't mean they are any less true or any less valuable. 

God created us in his own image, and he created us to all be diverse. In the New Testament, he says he wants people from all languages and all cultures to come to know Him. Jesus was an outcast, considered to be crazy, different, a threat. When other Jews (Jesus was a Jew) would look down on people of certain cultures, or people who had certain birth defects, or women who had to sell their bodies to survive, Jesus was merciful and approached and loved them just how they are. When asked why, he told them that a doctor does not come to visit those who are doing okay, rather, he comes to visit those who are ill. Likewise, Jesus came to befriend sinners, he did not come for the religious and widely-accepted people of the day. 

Who is a sinner? "All have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God." (Romans 2:23) ALL, this is NOT limited to freaks, lolitas, goths, gamers, nerds... nor does it exclude practicing Christians. God made us to be perfect, no human has ever been able to remain without sin. It's the curse imposed upon humanity. So God came down in the form of a Man, to die and go to Hell so that we wouldn't have to be perfect to know God, to call him our Friend, our Savior, our Teacher, or our Father. Many religions have belief in what life is like after death, and in what hell is like, but only Christianity has someone who went through death, who spent time in hell, and then who came back to tell people what it was like. 

If death was a wasp or a bee, Jesus caught it in his hand and took the sting. 

Last, even in the Old Testiment there is scripture about the End of Days (which, believe it or not, the Bible does not say that everyone dies at the end of the world). 

I feel sorry for those Christians who thought the Rapture would occur yesterday. Imagine how embarrassed and disappointed they must have felt... 

One man spent his entire life savings, over $70,000 , buying pamphlets and handing them out to people trying to warn them. 

So why do we need to further mock or degrade these people? 

Enough said.

Below are pictures from me just a few hours ago,

Saturday, May 21, 2011

In the Beginning...

     In the beginning, there was a girl. This girl wondered down many paths through out her life; among these were trials in the emo subculture, the punk, industrialist, cyber goth, steampunk, neo-victorian, visual kei, and yes- even "normal". In her early years, she adorned herself in chains and badly-applied make up from Hot Topic. By her last year in middle school, she had discovered and fallen in love with that which is Gothic Lolita. Her love and her ignorance (caused by a lack of money and exposure, as well as the delicacy of her age) lasted for two years. After two years had ended, her love shifted from that which was Moi Dix Mois, Malice Mizer, and Dir en Grey (among all things visual kei) and morphed into what is known as the Goth subculture. 

    Something which she had claimed for years in ignorance, she now began to explore and embrace. Alien Sex Fiend, The Cure, Siouxsie and the Banshees, Specimen, Type O Negative, Sisters of Mercy, Peter Murphy and  Skeletal Family were just a few to name which she grew fond of. Within a year from then, in her senior year, she found a soft place to lay in her adoration for Deathrock, EBM/Industrial, and a darker almost neo-genre of classical music. Now, she never forgot her visual kei roots, and even to this day she is a complete opheliac when it comes to Alice Cooper. She knows also of classic rock and many genres of metal due to friends.

     Now, working along-side this story of her advancement in music tastes, was that of her hobbies. While she was a Gothic Lolita, she could hand-sew quite well (although sewing machines were thought to be demons from hell sent to torture her). She got into roleplay, and made a successful roleplay guild which lasted for years and years with many people who were highly involved with her. In the last year, this guild which had been a huge part of her life and her creativity, died. One of her favorite characters was one which she had made back when she herself was a Gothic Lolita, and so this character however had grown and changed with her, while keeping her dark lace-adorned roots. As was posted on her facebook,

"It just suddenly came back to me who I want to be... A person whom I had known long ago, and ideal, but which somewhere along the way faced a silent, unnoticed death. I glanced in the mirror today and saw her reflection, then turned quickly away before I caught my own."

     So it became clear. This ideal which had lived within her mind and her heart and came to life through words and prose on a simple screen was, in fact, a reflection of herself and who she wanted to be. 

Before long, it was almost time to graduate.

This girl, who had always had very long blonde curly hair, cut it off 6 inches (making it just below shoulder length). Now, it was far shorter than it had ever been.

"By the time my hair grows back out where it was, I want to have become the person who I long to be. By the time my hair reaches down past my waist, I want to look in the mirror and see a girl who has never existed anywhere else except my dreams." 

So graduation came and gone, and she put all her of money back into savings for college. She is selling her guitar and playstation 2, and is getting ready to find a job in this economy to support the furthering of her education, and the pursuit of dreams. 

Sacrifices must be made, and I am ready to make them. 

I can not deny who I am, so instead I will change myself into who I want to be.

I am not "gothic", nor can I ever be; I am a goth. 

"Elegance Above All" 

So now, with naught but a back-account, a state id, a loving fiancĂ©e who gives me support and rides, and a nasty pessimistic attitude with a list of everything I never want to be, the journey begins to become a Goth Lolita.